just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
