kristin has been a bad kristin
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize