Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
