i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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