I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
