Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
