I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize