I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Randomize