Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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