no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize