I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
