Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
