The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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