well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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