either way he was missing a nipple.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Boobs are out for the taking
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
