I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
