That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
