He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize