I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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