Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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