i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize