Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
