just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
