WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
