:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I am mentally ready for anal.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
