Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
