Dual....:-)
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i think i have herpe
just one?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize
