If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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