i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
