: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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