How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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