I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
