seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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