Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
