Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
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