yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
How many fucks given?
0.12846
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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