I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You ate ashes out of my bong
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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