Non-Jews are for practice
the condom got lost in my hair
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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