theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
