Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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