somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Randomize