You smell like stripper and shame
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize