he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
