THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
