She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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