Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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