U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
