All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
