i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
