Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
should my penis look like a turkey
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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